Why is life so hard?
It is a combination of things that make us look at the World and think life is so hard and it is also an attitude that you can also understand easily.
I have had so much crap in my life that I have often hated my life for lots of different reasons.
Easy to say I know but in my experience after 3 marriages, 4 children, being made redundant 5 times, moving 15 times.
Then struggling to get out of bed in the morning I found the secret to what a great life should look like.
So I am going to reveal the secrets that I use on a daily basis to stay positive in life and live your best life by giving you my hints and tips and some advice on how and when a hard life might impact you most.
We are all also living through a global pandemic at the moment with corona virus and so many people are losing lives, friends and jobs that it is difficult to even feel sorry for yourself because everyone is struggling through life.
My Top Tips On Why Life Is So Hard And How To Live A Great Life Instead Starting Today
- Everyone is equal – I hear this a lot because people say why is life so easy for others and it is harder for me. That is because you only see what you see and whilst it might seem like someone has an easy life, you have not had to walk their path in life. If you had walked their path you will find that they too have the same shit that everyone else has thrown at them. It is just their ability to bounce back and follow their dreams that matters.
- Everything you think is just a thought – All the things that go around in your head and all the overthinking you do are just thoughts. Most of the things we process around us are interpreted in different ways through our own thinking and education. We are trained to think in certain ways from how we are brought up and our expectations are wildly different from each other in life. Every time you go down the negative though pattern of my life is so hard and I hate it, that is what you will eventually train your mind to think. This makes it even harder to turn those thoughts on their head when something good happens. When you learn to stay positive however and think good thoughts then you generally see life in a different light and your mind is trained to think good things. So when bad things happen you can accept them more easily.
- Controlling those thoughts – No thoughts can impact you unless you allow them to do so. You need to take control of these thoughts and act through fact and not fiction. For instance I guarantee you that every word you say is interpreted in a different way by different people. As everyone is individual with their own thought processes. So whilst you may think that they are having a great life and you are having a hard life. Unless you sit down and talk to that person and understand the differences between your lives you would never know the true answer. But we tend to make up our own minds just like judging a book by its cover. It is really important that the thoughts that you have are truthful and useful and can be used in a positive way in your life. You just have to stay consistent with it.
- You are in control – Only you can completely change your life if you want to. Whether you think you have control or not, you do. You are the only person that can make yourself get out of bed in the morning, you are the only person that can make yourself smile, you are the only person that can upset yourself, you are the only person that can get a new job, you are the only person that can put effort into life and live your best life moving forward. You are in control and when you take control of your life then life will not be as hard as you think it is.
- Bad shit happens to all of us – It is okay to feel sorry for yourself temporarily when bad things happen but if you want to live life in the dream then you have to move forward. At the moment I have lost my job and have 4 kids to feed and bills to pay. Do I feel sorry for myself no, I am improving my fitness, my cv, applying for jobs, practicing interview techniques and doing everything I can to make a better life when the dream job I want comes along. You have to become a better person inside when crap happens and not give into those intrusive thoughts that try and make you feel sorry for yourself. If you give into those thoughts like I said above you will spiral downwards and when you meet the devil on your way, you will wish you had thought about things differently. While you still have to arms and two legs you have every opportunity to change your life for the better moving forward.
- You have the power to do this – When you dig deep down inside yourself you have the ability and the power to do anything you want to in life. It is only because you are holding yourself back and thinking that life is so hard that is stopping you from moving forward. It is those awful thoughts that try and convince you all the time that life is hard and you cannot do anything about it. We all all need to learn how to cheer ourselves up and find happiness again. Sounds I know and it takes time to get a mindset of success but you can do this, you just have to put your mind to it.
- Practice kindness – My step daughter had been treated badly by her father when I met my new wide. She would sit in the corner of the room with her hood up and not talk to anyone. After a serious operation when she was young it left her with a birth mark on her face and she thought life was hard. She thought everyone was mean and everyone was unkind. Since knowing me my wife and i have taught her that life is not like that, surrounding yourself with good people who are kind, add value to your life, treat you properly will change your attitude towards life itself. Now she is beautiful, funny, amazing and loves life. So never ever give up just learn how to be nice to others and they will be nice to you too and offer you guidance and help through life.
- This is just temporary – We all go through life thinking this is just too hard. Sometimes pushing us to the limits where we think what is the point of life itself. I have been to those deepest darkest of places and I can tell you that there is light at the end of the tunnel. You just have to change your perspective on life by taking control of your life and living for yourself in mind. When you consistently keep moving forward then the law of averages says that good things will eventually happen. When you give up however the law of averages goes down and you have very little chance of pulling it back. In an analogy, it is a bit like wanting to win the lottery without ever buying a ticket and hating life because you never won.
- Work hard – If you set yourself goals in life and have a plan on how to achieve them then you will have a massive chance of living the life of your dreams. This is measurable and actionable and will give you the reward and recognition you need to evaluate whether life really is hard or whether you are just not trying hard enough to overcome the obstacles that get in your way. As above bad shit happens to us all, but when you challenge yourself in life to do more you accept that obstacles are going to come but you actively train your mind to leap over them when they arrive. This takes hard work and practice but you can do it.
- Don’t listen to other people – The biggest issue I see with people is they worry about what others will think off them. They worry about being criticized, picked on, not being popular, being hated. Listen life is hard when you listen to others because they can be cruel. As above with my stepdaughter people are horrible sometimes and you need to be kind to yourself instead. For every person that is unkind there are plenty more that will offer you the kindness and support you need in your life and if you are putting in the effort they will help you every step of the way. So move away from unkind people and do not listen to their cruel words either. No one should ever make you feel devalued in life and if they do then get rid of them as quickly as you possibly can.
- Have fun – I don’t care what anyone says life is what you make of it. You put in the effort and take control of your life and you will be rewarded for it. I haven’t told you half of what my life was like but I guarantee you in the dark days you always head towards the dark. When you make life what you want it to be and never give up on living your dreams, the responsibility and rewards that gives you makes you want to wake up in the morning with a smile on your face. Yes sometimes life can be really hard but you overlook those times and push them to one side and get on with your life again as quickly as possible.
Why Is Life So Hard In Common Scenarios
- As a teenager – Life is pretty crappy as a teenager and for no other reason than hormones, wanting to be liked, crappy school work, boredom, parents that don’t understand you and lots of other reasons too. This is a stage in your life where you will find it hard, you might live vicariously through others as role models, you might have no friends at all. The only advice I can give you here is this. My son was massively overweight due to my ex over feeding him at the time. He lost all interest in life and just was not happy. He came to stay with me and I taught him the importance of fitness, taking care of himself and within a few months he lost all of the weight. Due to his fitness he joined the basketball team and rugby team and is now one of the most popular children at his school and love by everyone. He thought life was hard and rightly so because he was picked on and treated badly because kids can be cruel. But he also wanted to change and he is a kind and considerate boy has been taught that empathy for others is important. But he tried and he courageously overcame every obstacle to now live a great life. So get out there and socialize, join clubs and get into sports. You will meet lots of new friends and your life as a teenager will become more fun as a result of this.
- After graduation or college – This is a massive change in your life as you have been studying for years and years and now have to get a job. Learn how to pay the bills and stand on your own two feet. This is the time where now you have to apply what you have learned into the workplace. So get a great cv done and approach companies on linkedin and others and offer to do some placement work whilst you are looking for that great job. Socialize with people in the community that you want to work in and network. If you want to be successful in life then this will stand you in great stead. Networking is one of the great assets that anyone can have if they want to do well in the future.
- Hard and confusing generally – Because we have to make difficult decisions in life and let go of the past. We have to take life with a pinch of salt and accept what it throws at us because we never know what it has in store for us. We know that everything happens for a reason and we have to accept this with the view of knowing that somewhere something positive will come out of it. This is hard when you cannot see the wood through the trees, but generally when you look back on bad events there is a reason for it happening in the first place.
- In relationships – If you have broken up with someone then you need to learn how to get over them and quickly. If you let them keep you in the past then you will never move forward in life. Being in relationships means that you have think about the other person as well as yourself. You cannot be completely selfish and you should have each others backs every step of the way. Yes life will be hard when you disagree on things but you have to find a way to agree to disagree and move forward together. True love will teach you this and if you are arguing consistently with someone and they don’t add value to your life and make it harder, then let them go, only if you have done everything to save your relationship in the first instance of course.
Why Is Life So Hard Frequently Asked Questions
- Is life supposed to be hard? For some people it can be yes and for others even though I said differently above they do have an easier life. I often look at friends and see they’ve been happily married forever, got great kids, still got their parents, doing well in life and happy. Even though it seems like they are better off than me, they actually aren’t because as a person I have learnt things in life that no one should have to feel and that is why I believe in kindness, giving love, being empathic because I have stood in most people’s shoes. I am not jealous at all, I am happy that they have not had to go through the pain that I have. But on the other hand I am proud of going through that pain because it has made me the person I am today too.
- Why do I suck at life? Sometimes we feel as if we have caused the problem but we haven’t. Life is about learning to live with others and learning how to act and behave in front of other people. This does not mean changing who we are, but it means learning to communicate in different circle in order to get the best outcome in life. So you don’t suck you just need to believe that you can do anything in life, build your confidence and get out there and prove to everyone that you are you and you are capable of achieving great things in life.
- How do I stay positive? Staying positive is hard and it takes work. The best way to do this is by having rewards and recognition for what you do. Whether this is playing as part of a team or having goals in life that you can achieve. Looking at accomplishing these things will make you feel positive that you can achieve what you want in life and will allow you go out there and do more of that.
- How do you handle difficult situations in life? You assess the situations with a clear mind and empathic approach as everyone has their own stories and wants their own outcome. All you can do is be the better person and know that whether this is a hard decision or not that everything does happen for a reason. So take your time with the decisions that you make and stand by them and don’t live with regrets. If you make a mistake, then apologize but keeping moving forward. We all make mistakes in life it is just learning not to do the same thing twice that is important.
- What makes a life worth living? Everyone has their own value in life, it doesn’t matter who they are, what religion, what color, what they like dislike. Everyone has their place for good or bad reasons. In your own life you want to look back with contentment that you have done everything you can to have the greatest life possible. You can achieve anything you want to if you learn not hold yourself back and go out there and get what you want. So find your meaning in life and get out there and do it.
To me life can be hard yes but by also giving love to others, finding fun in simple things, seeing the beauty around you, being kind and trying hard in life makes more sense than curling up in a ball and hating life and everything around you. I understand how hard it is though which is why I put my change your life transformation program together to help you can find here https://changeyourlifeforever.co.uk
Not only will you find out about why life is so hard but I will help you see life in a different way and help you live a happy and fulfilled lifestyle moving forward too. I hope to see you in there and in the meantime have a great life best wishes your friend Scott