How In control do you think you are of your own thoughts? Do you recognize when you are being completely unreasonable? Are you able to resist the temptation of speaking before you think?
They say that most of us are all crazy in some way and that if you locked everyone in a room and put a speaker through our ears that the thoughts we had to ourselves would make us all look mad as hatters. I did a video on the very subject you can find here.
You see our thoughts really can run away with us sometimes and you can think and imagine that the craziest things are going to happen. It also takes an awful lot of effort to rain those thoughts back in again.
I am not sure whether it is our survival mechanisms that make us questions everything and then assume that everything will turn into a disaster first and foremost. You don’t have to let these types of thoughts control you however and once you actually learn to brush them to one side and turn them into a positive thought instead life really does take on a completely new meaning.
I discovered this by going through hard times myself and now being on my 3rd marriage I have learnt that those thoughts really can ruin everything for you if you hold them in yourself and don’t communicate exactly how you are feeling. This holds true to talking about these strange thoughts with both your partner and your children.
Talking openly about the way you are feeling just lets people know that what is on your mind and let me give you an example. My new fiancé is absolutely adorable and I love her to death and wouldn’t ever want to be away from her.
The other day however I was in a foul mood, doesn’t happen very often but everything was going wrong. My internet connection was going up and down and I couldn’t hear anyone on the conference calls I was making, a book I ordered and was excited about reading came without the CD I was expecting, I couldn’t get a CD burner working with Windows 10 and well the day was just shizer to be honest with you.
Then my fiancé said a couple of things to me in jest and I took them completely the wrong way. I bottled all my emotions up and then just stormed out the house and went out on my bike. The reason why is I knew I was going to start saying stuff that I would regret if I stayed around.
By this time my fiancé to be honest had had enough of me being a moody arse and when I came back I apologised and let her know why I was frustrated and that the things she said I took in completely the wrong way. However she took it that I meant she had upset me and then thought that I was falling out of love with her.
This then obviously led to her mind racing about all sorts of strange things and it is quite easy for the situation to escalate. Luckily however we have both learnt to take criticism with each other and know that we would never intentionally want to upset each other in anyway what so ever.
But sometimes you just cannot control your moods, your thoughts and the way you react to things. It is just our nature, but what you can change is being open and honest with the people around you to show why you were thinking that and why you acted in this way.
So here are my top tips on controlling your thoughts and trying to act sensibly in life.
- Think before you react. Reactive behaviour really does trigger of lots of avenues that build themselves and build themselves to create even more problems that don’t even need to be there.
- Talk to your loved one’s share your emotions and laugh when you know you are being completely outrageous and acting like a dick. Sometimes we just cannot help it.
- Never go to bed peed off with your partner. Stay up and talk until you resolve your position and give each other hugs and kisses and maybe a bit more if you can squeeze it out 😉
- be kind to yourself. Every situation can be determined completely differently than what people actually mean and say. Give others the opportunity to explain what they meant.
- Learn to back down when you are wrong or unreasonable. Sometimes we have defensive mechanisms that make us argue more and for no point or reason either.
- Look at life with open eyes and see that your own thoughts are what makes the world go round. Our own thoughts control our emotions not other people or situations. We have the power to make any emotion a positive one if we choose too.
I wrote another article on finding happiness in life that you can find here too. I have learnt a lot of things through life by analysing my own behaviour and others and you can grasp that life really is what you make it and that you are in control of your own happiness then life really does open up into a great adventure.
Controlling your life and dealing with stress and anxiety isn’t an easy journey though. Once you realize that your thoughts are just thoughts though you control your own destiny by exchanging those bad thoughts with good one’s.
If you would like any help at all getting your life back on track and finding true happiness then join me on my transformation journey where I will show in a series of daily videos how I managed to turn my life around for the better. You can find out more here https://changeyourlifeforever.co.uk
Take care and best wishes Scott